is single but not available

today i having study group wif my fren and suddenly she ask me wat requires to ur bf, i dun noe how to answer her. and i ask her bc n she gif me a vry simple answer, she said she want her bf take gd k to her, n when he take gd k to her n means tat he oso will take good k to the family. actually in mind i haf many requires in before but now i really dun noe~

and the say y i din accept the guys who take gd care to me, n they think tat feeling can be train in the future. and they say me, u din accpent becos u are single but not available. i noe wat they mean, but is really like tat?? i really can say yk vry noe me much becos wat i din tell her but she oso can feel it~ yaya, maybe is like tat but i dun noe~

how stupid am i

jus realise that how poor of my communication!!
how stupid of my logical~ hiaz... i am so sad...
i really hope everything is going smooth, and will done well in my practicum!!!
i dun wish anything of tis kind of happen happen again~~
i will let her noe that how much i can effort on it~
i haf the stress of mum wanna buy car, becos i nid to paid. but the best thing i haf freedom and dun like others c down of me~~hiaz..... how STUPID am i~~ i wan to leearn how to say smart!!!!

hiaz....

今天还是一样心情超级有够烂！！！！
internship的那间打电话来告诉我，我只能到internship的时候才能去做！！
理由是我不够独立，他所谓的独立是我没有车！！！！！！这是什么世界！！！！！！
又不是我想要的，他的幼稚园在那么里面，都没巴士，我要怎么过去帮他代班？？？！！！！我真的很不爽！！！
是，我不独立！！！！因为我没车！！！！我明白了，我不会让你看死的！！
我一定要很努力！！！！今天超级不爽～～～

心情一天比一天down，心伤的越深～～我该加油啊！！

aiyaya~~

感觉我的心好像一天一天被割伤一刀，好痛哦～
问我为什么感觉到痛了？
我只能说其实是很小的事，不过我看得太在意了！！
搞到自己片体淋伤，我无法控制自己那么做……
为什么我总在不该执着的时候执着了？？？！！！
我在geng什么啊？？？
现在连我自己也不明白～

是我害怕了吗？
还是我需要那种依靠了呢？
有时还觉得很矛盾的，不过看着大家sweet sweet的！
还真的为他们高兴，然后就会想我的何时出现啊？？
Hiaz.....

七月，我希望是个美好的一个月份,该加油的人你们一定要加油！！
明天你们一定要很幸运！！！


我的心情最近都很不好……

My heart~

I dun wan to think too much of my life, but in fact i nid to think.
i dun wan to think my heart where is belong, but in fact i think much.
I hope everything can go smooth and have ppl to make choice for me, but in fact i have much of freedom to choose of my life. i din get any barrier when i nid to do anything but becos not haf any barriers make much scare on it, i dun haf any confidence.

I dun noe when the person come into my life again...
i get myself to believe that that is impossible but i still so degil tat giv myself a chance that deep into it, but i will get myself out in the possible time. i noe that the impossible hard to become possible so jus let me haf some time to leave it, n let myslef alone~~~

mostly breakdown

i hate wat am i now!!!
Y i scare all the thing happen on me, y i need to keep calling myself to be composedly.
But wat am i do now? scare tis scare thr, lazy here lazy thr!!!!
i wanna to be brave, y i cant~~
y everything i nid to help by others, y i feel so helpless~~~
i scare tomolo interview, i really scare actually i dun wish to go thr for internship, but should i do??i really really hate wat am i now~~

tell ppl tat i am 21, i think oso no ppl will belive. meet any problem jus noe how to cry to express wat i am~~ how should i do??? i kena pengsan 1 day if i keep like tat!!!!!!!

i hate it!!!!!!!!!!din settle the thing 1 day i think i jus noe how to cry on it~~~hiaz..............................................................................i really really is a useless person~~~

wat u think about me?

my college fren dun noe me much~~
when i wan to release my feeling tat got a feel tat i am angry wif them~
it is becos i seldom say out my feeling?? or my talk is too serious with them??


i am no idea....
N dun noe y tis few days i really vry pecek!!!!
i wan to calm down but not so easy~~
i scare everything i facing now!!!!
i hate wat i am facing now!!!!!!

but for conclusion, i nid to solve it, becos tis is my own business~~
i nid to be more powerful to meet all the thing!~~